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Three Things Daley #27

Wednesday, December 23rd, 2009

…New Year’s resolutions*, draft 1.2

1. Opposites world.  Do the opposite of everything you’d normally feel compelled to do.  If your every impulse is wrong, then you could change your life for the better.  Chances are, though, you’ll wind up in jail.  This could be a good route if you’re looking for some downtime.

2. Great pretender.  Get to expert-level in the field of pretence.  Why be yourself when you can be someone more intriguing?  Wear a mask - and not just metaphorically.  Nothing makes heads turn like a phantom outfit or a plague snout.

3. Pants on fire.  Lie with gusto to yourself and others until you’ve completely and spectacularly altered your reality.  After all, the truth might set you free, but lies can get you free stuff.  And free stuff SOLVES EVERYTHING.

*Also doubles up as a do-not-do list

Three Things Daley #1

Thursday, November 26th, 2009

1. It’s been a while.  Sorry.  I’ve been thinking about you though.  All the time.  Yes, I do feel guilty.  Yes, I’ve thought about what I’d say to you when the inevitable meeting arose.  I’ve thought of every issue I could cover, every idea and feeling I could express.  And the resounding phrase echoing in my head was “I have nothing to say” - which can’t possibly be true, considering I always have something to say, even when I have no reason/evidence/justification/ interest/permission to say it.  And even when I think or even say I have nothing to say, it’s always a lie.  Anyway, sorry.

2. I’m not bitter, but… actually, I am.  A bit.  In the spirit of preparation, I’m squeezing my mind-grapes now so that, in future, I can deliver a blog that doesn’t suck.  But for now, allow me to overindulge/feel free to ignore: my not-so-inner drama queen.  The small measure of wisdom I have tells me that the following counterproductive feelings will pass, and to that end I’m giving myself a deadline for this tantrum.  Also, I’ve been incredibly spoilt and blessed this past year, so it was inevitable that the bubble would burst.  But goddamn it, right now, man, I am bitter.  I feel like, in pretty much every aspect of life, I am back to square one - aka, an invisible hack.  And I’m confused about my hair colour.  Oh, and while I’m ‘here’, I don’t like the number 29.  A stupid indivisible integer for a stupid, impenetrable year.  No, wait, I didn’t mean that!  Come back!  I promise I’ll be creative.  I’ll start with breakfast*…

3. Not-quite-The-Artist’s-Way.  In a spectacular coincidence, right on the date of her Saturn’s Return, I ran into a friend from high school who I hadn’t seen in years – on a bus we both often catch, no less.  In our catch-up convo, she said that she overcame writer’s block and finally embarked on a novel-writing venture by writing three pages of just whatever’s in her head first thing every morning – known as “Morning Pages” in the creativity guidebook The Artist’s Way.  I tried this for three consecutive mornings and it was quite possibly my most hated writing task of all time - even more than essays in uni, more than what-the-hell-do-I-say-here? captions, more than writing Christmas cards to rellies I’m not all that close to.  Mornings are not my creative time – unless you count creating breakfast* – and so I conveniently forgot to do it again after those three days.  Believe it or not, there is a point to my telling you this.  In lieu of writing three pages every day (seriously that’s, like, 1500 words, man) I’m going to attempt to *deep breath* write three points on here every day.  Even if I think I have nothing to say.  Because, as we all know now, that’s a lie.